When I reached for your hand it wasn’t there to grab it
I’d look up to see your face
But you would look in another direction
distracted
Busy judging what others are doing
Rather focussing on them than on your own doings
I would grab your skirt
Pulling it a few times
Trying to get your attentions
You gave it a yank
And I would feel the fabric slip through my fingers
And you slipping along with it

I then would try to call your name
A little louder the next three times
Your response would always be the same
nothing…

Your mind is wandering somewhere else
You look a little lost
There’s a hollow look in your eyes
I’m hoping you’re doing okay
But I can’t ask because you’re too far away

I’d put my arms around your body
and lay my head on your chest
But it felt more like hugging a statue
than a human being instead
so     very     cold
I’d take a little of your sadness
to try and warm you up
But the endless emptiness doesn’t seem to stop
I would hug you tighter
tighter
and tighter
Desperately trying to make you feel better
Sometimes it would work
And on your face would grow a smile
but that only ever lasted
for a little while

– ARM